☞ THE LATEST

ARTICLES by LukeStarnes
February 20, 2012 3:05 pm
☺ 23 likes

Donald Trump demands to see Jeremy Lin’s birth certificate

New York Knicks standout Jeremy Lin has taken the National Basketball Association by storm, with the Knicks winning 7 of the 8 games the young point guard has started in. Lin has created a buzz worldwide, as people continue to praise the Harvard graduate. More »

VIDEOS by JakeWallach
February 20, 2012 1:31 pm
☺ 17 likes

Jake's Movie Monday: GDI Life

A tale of a God Damn Independent. More »

ARTICLES by drewthegoose
February 18, 2012 1:52 pm
☺ 8 likes

Transformers 4 Promises More Explosions, Less Plot

Michael Bay announced Tuesday morning that he is set to direct the fourth Transformers movie, promising that it will spend more time on explosions and focus less on dialogue and plot. The movie, set to release in 2014, is the highly unanticipated follow-up to last year’s Transformers: Dark of the Moon. More »

ARTICLES by tkaspo
February 15, 2012 4:40 pm
☺ 5 likes

Campus-wide fear plagues MU campus; Beware of the Vending Machine

Every great epic of an amorous partnership has an instance of deep heartbreak and betrayal. Brutus betrayed Cesar to take back the republic of Rome; Eduardo sold out Mark Zuckerberg for a book contract; Road Runner leads Wile E Coyote to yet again plummet upwards of 4,000 feet before producing a massive dust cloud. More »

ARTICLES by LukeStarnes
February 13, 2012 8:42 pm
☺ 9 likes

California’s 9th Circuit rules that Prop 8 is still pretty gay

Much to presidential hopeful Rick Santorum’s dismay, California’s 9th Circuit ruled that the infamous Proposition 8, which would ban gay marriage in California, was deemed unconstitutional. In response, Santorum used words like “absurd” and “judicial tyranny. More »

ARTICLES by Shermysherm11
February 13, 2012 1:45 pm
☺ 2 likes

Mizzou Memes

Since the dawn of unathleticism and staggering bitterness, web cretins have used memes (pictures of people/animals, each with a distinct and odd personality), to convey their wittiness to the great wasteland that is the Internet. More »

ARTICLES by Shermysherm11
February 13, 2012 1:45 pm
☺ 2 likes

Creepy Craigslist Ad of the Week

"dead cats" (Vegas bound&gaggd)Date: 2012-02-11, 12:46PM CSTI have a box full of themAnybody know a good place to dispose em? Well, Craigslist has hit a new creepy low. Let’s analyze. 1. Headline; dead cats. More »

VIDEOS by JakeWallach
February 13, 2012 1:12 pm
☺ 11 likes

Jake's Movie Monday: On My Birthday

Nobody wants to do anything on their birthday. More »

ARTICLES by Chris Varney
February 12, 2012 10:45 pm
☺ 6 likes

Complete stegosaurus fossil turns out to be Cheerios, broken bits of Cheerios

The entire scientific community held its collective breath last week when the most complete Stegosaurus fossil yet discovered was announced via press release. The press release reported that the nearly complete remains of the 27-foot armored stegosaurid dinosaur were discovered on a kitchen floor in Columbia, MO. More »

ARTICLES by hohun71
February 12, 2012 8:14 pm
☺ 7 likes

Reasoning Behind Radcliffe's Alcoholism Revealed: Gingers

The cause of Daniel Radcliffe’s drinking problem may be directly linked to his role as Harry Potter, according to a source close to Radcliffe.“Playing Harry was a huge part of Dan’s life,” said Radcliffe’s mother, Janelle Radcliffe. More »

ARTICLES by drewthegoose
February 11, 2012 11:26 am
☺ 13 likes

Greek Bailout: “The Yogurt Isn’t Working!”

Greek officials announced early Wednesday morning – the only workday in Greece - that despite its efforts to salvage their economy, the country has “very few” options remaining, citing that the yogurt hasn’t been enough to rescue their market. More »

ARTICLES by BradBabendir
February 10, 2012 3:09 pm
☺ 29 likes

Newspaper changes from Maneater to Personeater to remove gender bias

The Maneater, the award-winning student newspaper at the University of Missouri, has long been a place for talented and likely-to-be-successful journalists to collaborate with mediocre writers whose hearts will eventually be broken. More »

ARTICLES by Ian Arnold
February 9, 2012 10:22 am
☺ 6 likes

"Safety Dance" Outlawed; Second Civil War Ends

Chaos. Bloodshed. Annihiliation. 1983--the beginning of the most violent and horrific outbreak of violence in Columbia since the Civil War. Fast forward 29 years--the day it ended. Families of the victims won't be seen parading around Columbia. More »

ARTICLES by TheSethKlamann
February 9, 2012 9:36 am
☺ 10 likes

Study Finds OxyContin Best Tasting Pharmaceutical

The results of a study by the Food and Drug Administration were released this week, rating the deliciousness of prescription drugs on the market today. According to the agency, the popular narcotic and painkiller OxyContin tops the list, while congestion pill Mucinex and drowsy-free Vick’s cough syrup placed last. More »

ARTICLES by tkaspo
February 8, 2012 12:28 pm
☺ 20 likes

Rebecca Black: Dethroned, Debunked, and Liberated by Missouri's New Rap Crew

The duchess of "getting down on Friday," who has dictated various Facebook statuses, memes, and poorly crafted mixtapes finally chose which seat she wants to take and drove off in her illegally manned convertible to make way for a new crew of heavily autotuned performers; while this new singing troupe appears old enough to own a driver's license, the question of should they be allowed on the road of Youtube success erects. More »

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