From pirates to rap songs, calls for booty have a long,
winding history. A modern holler can be voice-based or textual, and is usually
a delicate, beautiful exchange between two people who don’t like each other
very much but want someone to keep them warm (well, their nether regions,
mostly) for a night (or for however long they have to stay until it’s not rude
to leave).

“We’re not against these calls, by any means,” Booty Call
Rehab Center founder Jenny Wood explains. “The problem arises when they’re a
compulsion, long past the point they’re welcome or acknowledged.”

Ms. Wood wants to stress their intention is to help anyone
on or around campus who needs it and make sure they don’t feel judged or
shamed. “It’s an addiction I overcame myself, and believe me, you’d be
surprised by who comes in here. This affects all sorts of people – we see male
and female students, people in leadership, even technology-savvy elderly members of
the community.”

While the center has been around a short time, the number of
people helped thus far is astonishing. “Every Thursday through Saturday at 2 AM,
and sometimes Tuesday, I’d be sending out “come over”¦ lol’ to the same
half-dozen people,” an anonymous patient admits.

“Within my first couple
treatments, I was down to a less-blatant “what are u doing”¦ lol,’ then “I
treasure our friendship in a nonsexual way”¦ lol,’ and eventually I was able to
stop altogether.”

In addition to counseling and other more traditional treatments,
Wood says the BCRC is revolutionary because patients are encouraged to exchange
numbers with each other. “This either solves their problem by finding them
someone who responds positively to their advances, or helps them to understand
how obnoxious it can be to be on the receiving end of lazy, consistently
ignored propositions.”

To know if you or someone you know could use the services of
the BCRC, a list of symptoms and a help email address (but not phone number,
for obvious reasons) is available on their site.

“My line, and a common one, was “bored. what r u up to,’ but
many people caught on to the fact that I was only bored after midnight on
weekends,” Jenny sighs. “I’m happy to say that chapter in my life is over, and
I hope I can help other people say the same.”